


Just another Dead Girl

by TotalFanFreak



Category: The Last of Us, The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Denial of Feelings, F/M, Gen, Guilt, Multi, Slow Burn, Unresolved Emotional Tension, mild slow burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-25
Updated: 2017-05-13
Packaged: 2018-09-26 21:22:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 11,669
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9922655
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TotalFanFreak/pseuds/TotalFanFreak
Summary: Everything in this world is temporary - friends, love, safety, anything you can imagine. But for once she wanted to think outside of that, she wanted him to become something more permanent.





	1. The Distance

Just another Dead Girl – Prologue

**[This will be a crossover, kind of a rough draft and wanting to get your opinions on it and the spin of it because I’ll probably try to write this either way, but wanted to see how far to actually take it. With my attention span I have to be careful lol, I don’t know why, but I always build up the crossover like a surprise but most that are into these fandoms should have a guess by the end of this. This will be eventual Daryl/OC with a mild slow burn and set in season 5.]**

_Aaron’s a damn idiot._

She had known this long before now, but seeing him go off towards that barn with those two women – who had taken his fucking gun, well, it bared repeating. She wasn’t sure what she should do now, he had wanted her to go with him, her petite size may soothe them and make them appear more approachable than just a random man coming out of nowhere. But they were feral, she could sense that, being that way herself not that long ago. From what they had observed from the group they weren’t going to take to two strangers, no matter what they offered. So she had given a firm shake of the head, and he told her to head back to the vehicles, keeping the area cleared until he came back. But he could be getting tortured right now, maybe strung up on his toes as the meat was stripped off his bones, watching as they devoured his flesh in front of him.

No better than the infected, she cringed at the thought, the two of them couldn’t be too sure, hell, those people had eaten dogs. Fucking dogs, no matter how hungry you are how could you eat a dog? Having a few of her own back home she didn’t know if she wanted dog eaters around her pups. There were too many fucked up people out there, and no matter how much you watch or listen to, it didn’t do any good to lend an open hand until you knew what you were truly delving into. Huffing in annoyance, she made her way towards the barn, the building being worn down enough that there had to be some kind of hole to peer into and make sure Aaron was all right.

Finding a good position she crouched and scanned inside, she counted all fourteen people plus the baby they had, and, as suspected, they had him on his knees as the men towered over him. Taking his backpack, they rifled through the contents before tossing the pictures at the man Aaron had determined was their leader. She couldn’t make out all they were saying, but she could hear Aaron’s soft mumbling as the bearded man strode towards him and punched. Her body braced, wanting to fight, but she was too far outnumbered and it wasn’t hard to figure out that even if she took down a few she would be overpowered and taken prisoner as well.

 

_**gif by rottenwasp** _

Maybe if she found a perch of some kind she’d have a better vantage point, being able to take them down without finding her. The drawback was they would kill Aaron, taking a guess that he had a partner and this was retaliation. Before she could search for another way, she heard rustling from behind her, seeing one of the infected heading towards the barn.

Looking back inside, no one was paying attention to the threats outside, and she knew if there was one more would follow, so going with her gut she stayed crouched as it made its way past her and struck it with her switchblade from behind. Scrunching up her nose, she wiped the rotted blood on her pant leg, giving another sweep of the field before heading back to her spot.

If more did come she was going to have to whistle signal Aaron and she had no clue how to do that without alerting the others to her. Getting back, she was glad he had come to, sitting up with a smile on his face making her roll her eyes back. Of course he’d keep smiling, he’ll be lucky they don’t think he was a complete lunatic. She became alert, her guard building on the word ‘firepower’ the majority of the people loading their guns and starting to edge their way out the door.

“Please, she’s just a girl, she’ll be cautious but she means no harm. Just tell her who you are.”

_Just a girl? Well, fuck you too, Aaron._

She sneaked her way to a cluster of trees watching as the group spread out in two on the road, one taking the south way the others heading north towards the RV. Aaron was trying, he always tried to help people, and though she was wary she knew she needed to extend the same courtesy. It was her job, but there was no way in hell she was giving them her stuff. She made her way through the trees, staying as quiet as possible as not to rustle the limbs too much and draw attention.

She got caught up in a sparse few of infected and though she knew she could walk past them she took her time and put them down. She only halted when she heard the familiar clunks of something heavy hitting skull. She waited a few more minutes until the sounds stopped, knowing the danger had been taken care of.

When she got to the RV, they were already inside, and she knew they were turning the place over. It wasn’t surprising, though it did shock her that she didn’t feel angry about it. She had been out here, out there in a lot of terrible situations and one thing you adapt to real quick is scavenging. You find whatever you have to, to survive. And she couldn’t put blame on someone else for doing the same thing. She contemplated if she should talk to them, with the number dwindled to five it should be more simple. But between the katana woman, the assault rifles, not to mention Red over there. He could be a teddy bear for all she knew, but she had met men like that before, the brawny type that’ll break you in half before tearing your head off.

Stay in the shadows, kiddo.

She didn’t need to hear him to do that. She knew better, too much had happened not to, and she knew she was at a heavy disadvantage at the moment. So she squatted in the pine needles and waited until they were gone, her scoffing that they not only took the car she had drove, but the entire RV as well, translating to any food that was stashed away. It would be fine, she kept food in her pack for this reason, and looking out ahead she was able to squint and make out the top of the water tower knowing she was to go there in this scenario as a rendezvous point. She estimated it’d be sundown by the time she got there, and if Aaron didn’t get there in the night then she was going to have to venture back to the barn by first light. She let herself take in the stillness of everything, letting the anxiety go.

Aaron would be fine, they had encountered ferals before, hell she had been one when he came to her, it didn’t mean your entire humanity was gone. Some common sense was left; just the will to live was more prominent. Those people had to have some good in them, they had a baby with them, they kept together, they cared. Right?

She shook her head; there was no point in thinking about it now. If it came down to it she’d take them out, if one damn thing happened to Aaron…But she needed shelter tonight. Though nothing out here would bother her, nothing ever bothered her, but people. People were what you had to look out for nowadays, deep down she knew it had always been such, but with the infected it had become more evident. But the infected didn’t have the thought process to plot and scheme, it was the people that did that.

And poor Aaron couldn’t accept that. That’s how she ended up being part of these excursions to give him common sense, that not everybody could be saved. But he never listened; to be fair she never listened to him either so they were both deaf. She looked up at the sky, maybe it wasn’t a bad thing though, maybe it was her that she should stop listening to.

The air was chilling as she approached the town, and she breathed in deep, these were the moments she liked, getting away by herself outside the gate being able to stay in the quiet. Ambling through the streets she looked for the mechanics shop they were to meet in. It would’ve been a great place to scavenge, but as Aaron pointed out, she wasn’t chosen to scavenge things, but people. And that the only things they could take if they found it was food and medicine since they were the things in continuous demand. She had sneered, back in the early days of adjusting, when she was still very hostile to everyone and everything.

She relented to it now, coming out to use the tools by herself when she needed them. Lighting a few candles she fiddled with her back pack, she wondered if she should set out some traps in case of something. She wanted to sleep, haven’t done so in days. But she needed to stay alert if someone besides Aaron were to show up.

_It’s a sound trap._

_A what?_

_It’s a sort of alarm._

Remembering this she took some of the rusted rims, and making herself a few, hanging them loose in the doorframes in case she fell asleep. She sat up in an old bench and propped her arm on the windowsill. She didn’t feel like trying to bowl water to rehydrate a meal, so she opted for the stale protein bar and cold coffee she had. She dunked the bar in the thermos letting the liquid absorb it before nibbling a little at a time, giving herself something to do while she waited. She looked out the window for what felt like hours. She had scavenged for empty bottles to use later on, tied fishing line that was in one of the toolboxes in the doors to act as trip wires, and did almost a hundred sit-ups when her brain was just done. It had gone blank, settling down and wanting to rest. Her knees still drawn up she let herself lie on her back and her eyes closing.

It didn’t feel like much time had passed, her head dizzy from its interrupted sleep, when she heard screaming nearby. Screaming and guns, never a good thing. Looking out the window she made out figures nearby, grabbing the rifle and knife she hoped she was making a smart move. Huddling her way in the alley she jogged her way to the source of the noise, seeing an ambush of infected. As her eyes adjusted she could make out Red from the barn trying to brain some. The coffee from earlier was making her jittery, her hands nearly shaking as she canvased the rest of the area. One of the women was getting overtaken so behind one of the vehicles she lined her rifle and took some of them down, the girl looked at the fallen corpse in bewilderment before taking her knife and plunging it into another one’s eye. Deciding the a knife would be better to not draw any more than was there she made her way over, almost shoulder to shoulder with the woman when she turned suddenly her knife thrusting into her shoulder.

_I’m an idiot._

The pain of not thinking before coming up hurt more than the gash, the woman’s eyes widening when she realized she wasn’t infected.

“I am so sorry.”

She shook her head at the woman, it was her own stupidity. Bunching up her shirt she gritted her teeth down as she pushed the fabric in the wound to stop the bleeding until she could look at it.

“You’re Ghost, right? I know – Aaron said you couldn’t talk.”

She nodded, being technical she could, but she preferred not to.

“We’ve been looking for you.”

Apparently to kill her, but she didn’t respond brushing past her to help get rid of the remaining infected. She silently helped drag them into a pile, ignoring the men as they regarded her. Done, she went back inside, pulling the bench with the good arm towards the mess of candles.

“Please, let me help.”

Looking to the door the woman that stabbed her was there. She was older than her, pale skin, gaunt hazel eyes, and brownish hair tied in a ponytail.

“I’m Maggie, I guess a name would help wouldn’t it?”

She gave a small smile to her, kind of liking her accent, it was more southern, and it reminded her of him. Maggie came closer and she had to shake her head at her, she didn’t want her to see her.

“Please, I am sorry about that. I know it’s a stretch but my father was a vet and he taught me a little bit. I can help stitch you up.”

Shaking her head again she reached for her bag when she heard something clicking. Turning herself to the door she saw a man holding a crossbow, aimed at her fucking head. Her lip curled up in anger.

“Daryl, she’s wounded, she’s not gonna –“

“Hand yer weapons over.”

He motioned for her gun, and bow. Pressing the shirt further into the wound she skidded the gun towards him as well as the arrows but not handing over her other belongings.

“Give the rest.”

She shook her head.

“Daryl –“

Reaching for her pack the man took a step further, tripping over the wire.

“Oh, that’s smart.”

“I nearly cracked my fuckin’ skull and ya tell her she’s smart?”

“She was protecting herself, and she’s hurt so can you please stop? I think her and Aaron have proven that they’re not going to hurt us.”

“You don’t know that.”

As they talked she dug in her bag for the dry erase board she carried with her. Exhaling she chewed the top off and wrote.

_“Thank you for the offer, but I can patch myself up. I’d rather do it alone, and someone should watch for Aaron and your friends to get here. As for MY shit, you can take what I gave you but you ain’t getting my bow. It’s mine, it was given to me by someone I cared about and you can keep that aimed at my head all damn night if you want you’re not getting it. You already took the shit in the RV, you’re not getting my bag or bow.”_

His hooded eyes slit down even further after reading the board but she was going to relent and after a few tense moments he scowled and looked away, lowing his own bow, and scooping up her gun with the arrows.

He better give them back when we get home.

She looked back to Maggie who tried to give a reassuring smile before standing.

“Um, would mind, Aaron had a flare gun on him. And he said, we lost them a ways out and maybe if we signaled them –“

Maggie trailed off, but she didn’t need to be told twice, rummaging she pulled out the gun and handed it over.

“She had another gun on her?”

She narrowed her own eyes back at the man as Maggie gently pushed him out of the room.

_Finally._

Digging again, she pulled out the med kit, hissing as she pulled out the cloth and looked at the wound. It wasn’t too deep, but she would need to stitch it, luckily the bleeding had subsided. Getting out the little bottle of alcohol she took one of the pencils she had and bit down, letting the liquid pour onto the wound, a jolt of fire rushing through as her body jerked. Her hands were still shaking but she got was able to thread the needle, and pulling up off the shirt, glad to have worn a tank under it, she pushed the flesh together and started looping it back together.

It was slow paced, tears dribbling as she progressed, having to wipe the new blood away every few stitches as it oozed. Packing gauze on top of it she taped it down, contemplating drinking the rubbing alcohol to ebb the pain. Pulling another long-sleeve shirt from her bag, she struggled to get it on, the pain making her woozy as she got her arm through. Her right arm, of course it’d be that one, looking down she raised the sleeve to trace her fingers along another scar on her forearm, a tattoo covering a good majority of it.

She felt the presence more than hearing, and she shook her head. It was Crossbow again. For some reason he put her off more than damn Red did. She was reminded when she was younger and her class had taken a trip to the zoo, they had gotten to see a panther. It had looked so cute, rolling on its back in the grass, coming to the window where they stood and rubbing itself on the glass. They had all cooed at it. Wanting to pet it. Then she heard the zookeeper tell the teacher.

 

_**gif by kendaspntwd** _

“It’s a predator tactic, they try to play themselves down to look like they’re not a threat, but if that glass wasn’t there he’d rip those kids to pieces.”

Crossbow already looked like a threat though, but his eyes said something different. It was funny, how every single person had their own story, yet nobody else would ever really know it. Just reading others with what they displayed. She didn’t know shit about him and he knew nothing of her. But she didn’t like his stare, didn’t like how he kept that bow at the ready on his hip. She didn’t know why, not even sure how, but before her brain fully let her comprehend what it was doing she felt her vocal cords shift.

“Take a fucking picture, David Bowie.”

She flushed in shame instantly. Not only were the words garbled from the lack of use of her voice, but they were muffled from her stump of a tongue. Her hand went to her mouth and she turned away. Feeling embarrassment course in her. She had startled him, she could tell that, and with his own snort left her alone. She couldn’t stop it, and she felt a tear slip down her cheek, brushing it away as soon as she could.

“Ghost!”

Gazing up she saw Aaron and she smiled. Thank God. He hugged her to him, making her wince.

“Oh, God, you’re shoulder, Maggie told me. I’m sorry, honey. Are you okay? Do you need help with it?”

She shook her head, shifting to her pack again she brought out the plate she had found a few days ago and signed to him –

_“Since both of us have been through the ringer maybe you earned your surprise early.”_

“Alaska, how did you…yeah, I’m, I lost the car.”

She snorted in laughter, making Aaron laugh too.

“You can be such an idiot sometimes.”

“I know, but you like me anyways.”

She nodded. Turning away when she thought Crossbow was back in the door. But it was the bearded man.

“Oh, Ghost, this is Rick, Rick, Ghost.”

The man nodded at her, her giving an uncomfortable wave back, he still didn’t trust them. Which was fine, she didn’t really trust them either.

“If you’re okay, I’m going to go talk to them for a minute.”

She nodded at him, telling him to go as he took off his jacket and draped it on her.

“Get some rest. We’ll be heading out early.”

She watched them leave, before pulling her pack up and resting her body against it. She was exhausted, but she didn’t know if she could nod off with these people around.

_Goodnight, baby girl._

Her eyes prickled.

Goodnight, Joel.

Sleep did not come to her that night.


	2. Blind to it All

**Chapter 1 – Blind to it All**

The whole town was fuckin’ crazy. Those people were all lying to themselves and Daryl knew it. He was growing angrier at the fact that his own people were being slowly drawn into this as well. Was all a ruse, so Carol and Rick said. Gotta make nice with everyone so no one gets suspicious, going to get guns and take over if need be. It was probably bullshit. Let them all dress up in their new clothes, let them take the jobs they were told to do. He wasn’t doing a damn thing. He wasn’t part of this and he wouldn’t be, but he stayed, and he wasn’t sure why. He sat on the porch fixing his crossbow, subtly watching as people poured from their homes to enjoy the day. He sneered at that – walking dogs, fixing their yards and rocking on their porch swings like nothing bad had went on. As if they were safe from everything because of that thin wall around them. They were all stupid as shit.

He was forced out of his inward rant by footsteps coming on the porch, animal steps, looking from his bow he saw a golden retriever sitting at the steps looking at him. He stared it down, the mutt had seen better days, ear and back leg missing, tufts of fur gone, looked to be missing teeth too. He knew the thing was friendly though, and knew if the damn thing was here then his owner would be following.

_You said there was a dog._

_Maybe he’ll come back around. Come on._

He wanted to kick the thing off the porch then. He wanted to go out and kill that other fucking mutt too. Hearing heavier steps, he saw the girl going to the door without a glance in his direction. He smirked at that. Girl seemed to be the one of the few people here he could tolerate, that seemed to have a fucking notion of what was going on in the world. As well as the way she had stood up for Glenn when that one jackass kid had tried to swipe at punch at him. Girl had stood between them and waved her hands around. Fucker said something and when he went to hit Glenn she had grabbed him and threw him to the gravel. For her size and stature it was impressive.

But she didn’t seem to care for him at all. She had come storming over the day after they arrived, gesturing to her little board that she demanded her arrows back. She did that repeatedly the first few days not believing when he said he didn’t have the damn things. Which was a lie, he did, but he wasn’t going to give them back to her acting like that. And he hated to say it, but somewhere in him, he enjoyed pissing her off. That flicker of smoke building in what he had dubbed as creek bed eyes. Her face becoming the same shade as her hair until she started to come towards him usually stopped by Aaron or his partner. She stayed with them, both men were protective of her, Daryl didn’t have a clue how old she was but she couldn’t be that old.

_Probably the same age as Beth._

He filtered that emotion with a long hiss through his nose, clearing his head and setting himself back to his crossbow.

“Oh, hi Ghost.”

Carol’s voice dripped with overripe sweetness, and he felt a scoff welling up in his throat on that. He could also feel the girl’s discomfort at such excessive affection. He kind of felt bad for her. Barely.

“This is just what we needed, thank you, you didn’t have to go through all the trouble though.”

He could feel the creak of the floorboards underneath him, and he knew the girl was trying to retreat the dog already bounding down the stairs for her. He felt a shift before something hit him in the face he was about to bound up but she was already gone and Carol was laughing.

“What she give you?”

Besides a good smack in his face? He found some small tubes next to him and read that they were rail and bowstring lube.

“Shit for a crossbow.”

“Oh, she likes you.”

He gave a sarcastic grunt.

“I’m serious. Everyone else has to ask her for things, but not you.”

“Yur actin’ like she comes and gives me shit all the time.”

“I know, I’m just making an out loud observance here.”

“Little brat’s probably tryin’ to butter me up so I’ll give her arrows back.”

From the sigh he knew that was the wrong thing to admit. “You said you didn’t have that poor girl’s arrows.”

“Poor girl my ass, she’d probably kick us all out if given the chance.”

“I don’t believe that. It’s funny, I truly don’t, and you haven’t seen her around Carl or Judith to see. She’s like us is all. The world’s made her like that.”

“Girl probably grew up in a place like this, don’t know nothing’ bout what’s out there or what’s goin’ on.”

“I think we both know that’s not true. And you’re a grown man taking things from a young girl.”

“Not that damn young, how old is she anyways?”

“Twenty, I think, I don’t know. You don’t need to be scaring people off; we’re trying to fit in here.”

“You are, I ain’t. All of ya can go run off with the rest of the loons here, not me.”

He knew her eyes were narrowed on him, he could feel the heat behind them. “Have you even bathed since we’ve been here?”

“The hell you need to know for?”

“I told you we need to keep an appearance here.”

“And mine’s been the same since we got here, there’s no point in it for me.”

“Go take a damn shower, I mean it, when I come back and you haven’t I’m taking a bucket of water and washing you down.”

He snorted. “Whatever.”

“I mean it, keep your dirty clothes if you want, but you better be clean.”

He watched her walk off towards the house with the food pantry, he knew she wasn’t lying, Carol had done that to him in the prison dumping a bucket of lukewarm water over him while he slept before throwing a rag and soap on him while he was still sputtering out the dregs that had gotten in his mouth. Fiddling with the bow for a few more minutes he decided it would be good, he could handle dirt he lived in it a majority of the time but it didn’t hurt to scrub down before the layers of grime took over. Add in to the facts that the last time he was rinsed off was during the storm at the barn and that since Carol was gone the house was empty, a first since they arrived.

Daryl didn’t like people around when he bathed, or changed, he never liked to take his shirt off or show his body. It was vulnerability, and it showed the times when he was the most vulnerable. He preferred to be clothed to be shielded. Maybe that was why he bathed so little, to not shed that protection. Even by himself he felt defenseless and shame as he took off his vest and shirt. He kept dodging the mirror not wanting to see the scars on his back. He watched the water run in the tub before discarding the rest of his clothes, watching how the crud from his feet came off and tinged the water brown before swirling down the drain.

He turned the shower head on, a sigh close to escaping him as the hot water scalded his scalp. Cracking open the shampoo and giving it a sniff to make sure it wasn’t too girly he lathered his hair making sure to rake his nails through it. It was one of the things he remembered his mama teaching him, an easy way to clean his nails. He felt the rills of water flow down the sides of his neck the suds getting caught on the sparse hairs on his chest before the water washed it away. He could get used to this, the steam breaking his airways, soothing him.

Then he heard something, the calm evaporating as his head jerked from the tiled wall. He could feel the shift in the air too, someone was in here, and jerking open the curtain he found he was alone, and in more ways than one, his crossbow missing from its place by the sink. There was a rumble inside him, anger surging throughout. Throwing on his clothes he all but stampeded out the house, looking up and down the street where he found Rick speaking to Aaron. His shoulders pulled back, ready for a fight when he approached them.

“One of your people took my shit.”

Aaron looked dumbfounded for a second. “What do you mean, Daryl?”

“My bow's gone, I want it back. Fuckin’ now.”

He felt Rick put a hand on his shoulder, easing him back. “Let’s calm down, this could all be a misunderstanding.”

He wrenched away from Rick. “I was takin’ a damn shower and someone came into the bathroom and stole what’s mine. What the hell am I misunderstanin’?”

They both turned to Aaron who held up his hands in a passive defense. “I’m not sure who would do something like this, but we will find out who did. I promise you, Daryl.”

Rick nodded. “Could’ve been one of the kids, they see you walking around with it all the time, might’ve wanted to see if they could play with it.”

“Ain’t a fuckin’ toy!”

“I know, Daryl, just spit balling ideas here.”

“Hey fellas.”

It was Eric, the jolly step halted when Daryl’s eyes focused on him.

“Am I interrupting something?”

“Someone took Daryl’s crossbow.”

Eric’s face fell, before his eyes darted to Aaron’s, whose brows furrowed in turn. Daryl saw the gesture pass between them, and he pushed the man to turn to him.

“You know somethin’ then you better be tellin’ us.”

His hands stroked his pants, wiping sweat off. “It was kind of why I was coming over.”

Rick’s gaze turned skeptical. “Which was why?”

“Was going to thank Daryl for being so nice, I ran into Ghost on her way out and she –“

“That little bitch stole my bow!”

Aaron became provoked then. “There’s no need for calling her that. She’s at fault and we’ll rectify it, but I’m sure she didn’t mean anything –“

“Sure there is, pissed because I kept her arrows.”

Aaron tilted his head. “And why would you keep her arrows?”

Daryl felt his rage diminishing being replaced with contrition. “I just felt like it. Girl thought she had every right to come charging over and demand shit, not how things work, so no, I wouldn’t fuckin’ hand them over to her.”

Aaron nodded. “We know where your bow is now, I don’t think Ghost would do anything with it. She possibly just wanted a rise out of you. Which she got, Eric, where’d you see her go?”

“Uhh, that’s the thing, when I ran into her she was telling me Daryl thought since she knew how to handle a bow she could use his crossbow and –“

“Where the hell is she?”

His mouth gaped at Daryl. “She went hunting, outside the fences.”

“I thought the three of us agreed she’d stay in here for a while?”

Eric shrugged. “You know she gets restless, and I assumed you knew.”

Daryl grunted. “You assumed wrong, where she usually go?”

“She’ll be back before –“

“I don’t give a shit I’m goin ta get a gun –“

Aaron was in front of him then. “There’s no need for violence in this.”

“Ain’t gonna get violent, I’m goin’ out there, getting my bow. She can do whatever the hell she wants after that. She ain’t keeping my shit.”

Rick cocked a brow, smirking. “Might want to give her back her shit when you get back.”

Daryl sneered, before Aaron told him where she usually went and turning around to the armory.

“And if you just sign this.”

“What for?”

The woman’s eyes went large, magnified by her glasses. “So we know that you’re the one who borrowed the pistol.”

“Fine.”

Scribbling his name down he picked the gun up, the weight nowhere near as comforting as his bow. He attached to the holster in his hip and tore through the town before getting out. It was actually good to be out of there. The build-up of staying inside for too long, of course it hadn’t even been a week, but cabin fever set in easily for him. There were animals about and if he had his damn crossbow he would’ve been glad to hunt, but he didn’t, a fuckin’ kid had it doing God knew what to it. His anger flared back up, keeping himself aware as he stormed through the trees. After a while of zipping through the woods and trying to find any clues of a track he was starting to think Aaron had been wrong.

_Or he fuckin’ lied._

He could already tell from the minor interactions he’d seen that both men were protective of her, as she was with them. But hell, he wouldn’t hurt the girl. But he sure as hell was going to make sure she wouldn’t touch his shit ever again. Coming up close to a field, he tiptoed to the edge of it, trying not to make a sound in case anything was out in the clearing. Not seeing anything he was about to step out in the open when he felt something prod his back. Even with his vest on he could feel the point of the arrow. His fuckin’ arrow.

“What ya gonna shoot me girl?”

He felt the pressure retreat then, footsteps heading away. He turned seeing the bob of red leaving.

“Hey! You had yur fun, now you better be givin’ my bow back.”

She turned to him then, her eyes calm and calculating. He didn’t like looking in them too long, the color reminding him of the creek behind his childhood home, the top of the water clear and steady where at the bottom the green of the moss was amplified. The one him and Merle would fish in just to try and get something in their bellies. His gaze shifted her hand stretching out as if expecting something.

He huffed. “I ain’t got yur damn arrows with me.”

She tilted her head, a small smirk on her face. It was almost a confession to her and he knew it.

“I’ll fuckin’ give ‘em back, you hand over my damn crossbow first.”

She hefted it in her arms, and he was again impressed on how she lifted it so easily. The weight usually bearing down on such small arms, she eyed the weapon before looking back at him. Then her hand started moving again and he snorted.

“I don’t understand any of that shit you’re doin’.”

Her lips pursed, close to angry before she gestured to her side. The place she usually had that board with her, now empty.

“Can’t help that I don’t know what yur sayin’.”

He saw her teeth clench, before relaxing. “Show me.”

He reared back, the voice muffled, but clear. “I ain’t showing ya nothing girl. You steal my shit and think I’m gonna teach ya something?”

She leaned back, her expression cooling again before starting to walk away.

“Hey!”

She walked a few feet ahead, catching up he gripped her elbow, pulling her back. She got a kick to his shin before falling to the ground. She looked up at him, an embarrassed anger on him.

“Just give it back, girl.”

Her slitted eyes widened, hauling up the bow and aiming at him.

Daryl took a step back. “The fuck –“

The arrow plunged behind him and he heard a thud. Damn walker had almost got right on them.

“This shit ain’t no game.”

She shook her head at him.

“I ain’t playin’ no more girl.”

She snorted, before heaving his bow across from him. “Doesn’t matter, been told only people with actual skill use compounds anyway.”

Picking up his bow, his head reared up at the statement. “Whoever told ya that’s full of shit.”

She rolled her eyes at him, getting up and walking away again.

“The hell you going?”

She didn’t answer him, moving out into the clearing and away from him. He looked behind him. He got his shit back, he could leave, he should leave. But seeing the girl by herself left him unsettled. Getting pissed at himself he started to jog after her, neither of them saying anything when he caught up.


	3. Guns and Something like Roses

**Just Another Dead Girl – 2**

**Chapter 2 – Guns and Something like Roses**

"Don't you look stunning, you know, I've heard cowboy boots are very in this season."

Ghost rolled her eyes at Eric, yet she could feel the rush of blood to her face at feeling so exposed. She hated when the Deanna threw parties, pretending everything was fine, acting like they were on the set of a 1950's show, but mostly she hated the dresses. She had been praying that after darting outside the gates for the majority of the day she could have opted out of her turn for going to Deanna's. But the excursion seemed to have backfired and led Aaron to use the party as a type of punishment for taking things that didn't belong to her. She had tried to get them to come around, Crossbow had taken shit from her, and she retaliated. She had stuck up for herself, and in the end had made things right. None of it mattered to Aaron, especially since him and Eric hated going as much as she did. She hadn't mentioned he had tagged along with her, didn't say anything about the horse, or that neither of them spoke until they had come back to the gate.

_"Heard you were looking for guns."_

_She caught herself smiling at his tension, anxiety flooding into the blue eyes that were usually indifferent._

_"The fuck ya hear that?"_

_She shrugged. "You and your friends were holding a meeting outside my shed, can't help but hear things."_

_He came up to her then, towering over her small size, and she knew he was trying to intimidate her. She bit what remained of her tongue to keep from laughing._

_"Yur shed? How the fuck is it yurs? How da fuck ya even out there? Or is it any of yur business what we're lookin' for?"_

_She could smell him, soap from where he had showered, dirt mingled with rotted blood when they had encountered some infected. She could feel him buzzing, hands shaking as he held in his anger._

_"Yes, it's MY shed, Deanna gave it to me to work in so I wouldn't destroy the town, if you would take a look there's a padlock on it. And while we're on it, whichever one keeps fucking with the tarp needs to stop, I bring that shit to fix not to rust in the rain. And to let you know, it is my business, you want to steal from us. I'm offering you another way."_

_Crossbow pondered it, obviously wanting to know what she'd get out of it._

_"I heard your friend, Mrs. Peletier, but she's wrong. Olivia takes inventory pretty much every other day. On everything. She'll know whatever you took is gone, and we both know with your group being new you'll be the first suspected."_

_He remained silent staring her down, Ghost didn't mind, to her it meant he was listening._

_"I don't know what you want with them, but I can get you guns –"_

_"Why?"_

_It was her turn to harden. "I know you guys are scared –"_

_"We're not –"_

_"I don't know everything that's happened to you; just the same as you don't know about me or anybody else. I get it, you think this could be a fuck up on you, and you want to protect yourself. Fine. I can help with that. I'll admit there's assholes here, but they're not bad people, you'll make your own call later on. But what I want…I want you to help protect them."_

_She saw the confusion, his mouth turning up to the side trying to figure out what she was asking._

_She gestured to the gate. "You know they can't take care of themselves, Deanna won't let them. But you and your group already know, and sooner or later shit will happen. It always does, if there's four walls and someone's in it somebody else is going to want in. I just want some help stopping that. You know…if you plan to stay, the other stuff, about taking over, eh, maybe forget about that. I could make things ugly for you guys."_

_The amazed look on his face broke her, and she grinned, turning to walk away as she signaled for the gate to open._

_"You live in the suburbs now, careful what you talk about on the porch. And don't forget my arrows, or I'll take something else from you."_

She walked to the mirror, looking at the upswept reddish locks. Even in the before she hated dressing up, it never looked quite right on her. She was okay to look at, as long as she had clothes on, but with her tomboy build she never was comfortable with primping. And now staring at the reflection of herself in a pale pink dress as if in some bizarro universe she definitely felt at a disadvantage, she may as well go to the party naked.

"You do look beautiful, El."

She lowered her eyes upon hearing her name, so unused now, Aaron being the only one allowed to call her that, him and Eric the few people she had allowed to dispel herself to. She was broken, a fragmented body and mind, each death had taken a piece from her, and no matter how she tried to weave it back there were still gaps in between. She hadn't wanted to let anyone else in, not after Wyoming but Aaron had dug his way in her shell his magnanimous nature turning her back into her old self a fraction. She clung onto them, maybe not physically, but she kept an extra eye on them, leaning on them in turn.

She signed her thanks, turning away when Aaron caught her arm in a soft squeeze. "You only have to stay an hour." He gestured to her clothes. "I know you don't like this part of it, but you never know the new people could make good friends. Some of the girls that came looked around your age. It doesn't hurt to put yourself out there. You don't – you don't need to carry so much weight on your own. You're too young to be burdened like that, and you don't have to hold so much in."

Aaron has told her this before, several people have, but she could never figure out a way to let go. The load tethered to her no matter what, and sometimes she wasn't sure she wanted to cut it loose. But she did know she didn't trust the newcomers yet, and she wasn't going to blurt out all her secrets to someone she didn't know. Aaron and Eric had been the exception, that was all she needed, and even they didn't know everything – being like everyone else and drawing their own ideas of her. She did her best to give an assuring smile, picking up a shawl to cover her arms, and a satchel purse that carried various things she picked up for people on her runs. Appeared Deanna thought her backpack was too dirty and not appropriate to be worn at her parties.

"Have a good time!"

She threw a cross look to Eric before going out the door. It was chilly out, but she didn't feel it, the sun was still out, close to setting and she wished she could take off again. She never liked being inside here too long, it stifled her, and peeping at the houses she passed she felt claustrophobic for a moment. She smiled though when she saw Lucky and Bandit scurrying through the tall grass by the gazebo, she could have whistled for the dogs but knowing how Deanna felt about them made her keep going. They were good dogs, kept a lookout on the inside of the community, yeah, they looked like they went through a wood chipper but who didn't that was outside of here? Getting on the porch she fiddled with her dress, wishing she could pull an excuse out when she rang the doorbell. It didn't take long for someone to answer.

"Hey Ghost, don't you look fetching tonight, come on in, think mom's been waiting for some help in the kitchen. Afraid some of us are hopeless in that department."

She forced a smile, pulling the shawl tighter around her arms while she walked through the house. Spencer was always kind to her, but she had a hard time differentiating what was sincere and what was his political ego coming out. But they were both polite to one another. She'd rather be stuck with him than Aiden, so what if Spencer was the golden boy in his parents' eyes, he wasn't neglected, hell he should be thankful he still had both his parents, his family. She felt like an old woman compared to him, though Aiden was older, the young man constantly acting as if he had something to prove like a kid throwing a temper tantrum when someone wouldn't look at his crayon scribbles.

"Ghost, how lovely to have you, come here and help me set out the plates."

She did as the older woman instructed, placing the china in its spot. Before being assigned another task she dug in her bag to get out a book she found for Mr. Monroe.

"Aha, Architecture and Mechanical Drawing, Reg will love this, dear. You know, you don't have to carry that thing around all night, don't you?"

She shrugged, she had a bag with her most of the time, the added material becoming a barrier for herself. She signed to the woman, asking what she could help with next, Deanna didn't have as broad of knowledge on signing as Aaron did but it was enough to get her by and not have to bring out her board. She helped with the punch, the record player, and was asked not to go outside the fences the day of the next party Deanna telling her everyone would be disappointed that she hadn't made a dish. Not long after listening to more of Deanna's concerns about her, and how she should involve herself with more activities inside the community people finally started filtering in letting her slink into the background. She wouldn't leave yet, but she didn't want to mingle anymore. She thought about pouring herself a drink, tapping her fingers around on the various liquor bottles. She took one of the crystal glasses and filled the glass halfway with a clear one.

_Easy on that stuff it's not beer._

She learned, and sipped the foul smelling liquid, her face puckering when her body asked her to spit it out. But she was able to choke it back, the stuff burning her throat and belly on the way down. She let herself roam around the rooms, the warmth of the alcohol wrapping her up like a blanket, as no one paid much attention to her as she blended in. As she often did her eyes went to the paintings the Monroes collected, trying to connect in her head what the abstract work could be. She read the caption between two of the pictures – "A painting is not a picture of an experience, but is the experience." Guess that made sense.

"Ghost!"

Spinning around, she prepared for the attack, a heavy blur bracing on her legs.

"I missed you."

She grinned, reaching for her board.

_"You saw me yesterday."_

She disentangled herself from the small limbs. Stooping down to be at eye level with Annie's little sister, Sadie. She was six, and very precocious, staying with Eric when Annie and the other runners went out in the van. Being another female, and closer in age and interests it was safe to say if she was around Sadie liked to stay with Ghost.

"So, still missed you, you never gave me my present either."

_"Who says I got you anything?"_

Sadie slackened her body, feigning exasperation. "You always bring everybody something when you're gone that long."

That was true, if her and Aaron zoned in on someone she'd scavenge the area and bring back what she thought someone would need, and she'd do her best to include as many people as she could. Smiling at the girl, she dug through the bag; find the medium sized wooden box.

"I knew it!"

Ghost chuckled silently, as Sadie wrenched the lid open. "Wow."

It was a tea set she had found when her and Aaron went into some of the sparse houses. The set was small, like it was made for a child, but made of a buttercream yellow glass.

_"You'll have to be careful with it."_

The girl nodded in stunned gratitude. "I will. Will you have a tea party with me and Annie soon?"

"A tea party?"

Ghost's eyes went up, seeing the older version of Sadie coming up to them. Annie was dressed like she just came in from the gardens, jeans splayed with mud, sweat rings under her arms and her hair mussed.

"Yeah, look what Ghost brought me!"

Annie's gaze went to the box, looking over the contents with a smile.

"Wow, d'you thank her?"

"Yes! I want us to have tea together."

Annie nodded. "That'll be fun."

Going into her bag she threw the brunette some scented bath salts. The older girl laughed.

"Just what I needed, well, I guess we all get presents today. Thanks for all this Ghost. We only came in for a second to tell Deanna we can't stay, but Sadie wanted to show off her dress and to see you."

_"It's a very pretty dress too."_

Sadie grinned, twirling in her frock dress, making the older two chuckle.

"Really, Ghost, thanks, for everything. Not just for this but for you guys watching out for her, Aiden's been pushing us out more, and it sucks not being home as much."

Ghost nodded, understanding.

"Will I see you tomorrow?"

_"Probably. Don't think I'm going out."_

"Good, Mrs. Miller said we can pick some of her flowers to make crowns."

Ghost snorted, but hugged back when Sadie flung herself on her. Following Annie out she waved them goodbye. She had hoped to slip out then, but when she edged towards the back exit she heard her name being called again.

She stopped herself from rolling her eyes, turning to see what Deanna wanted. She was waving her over, Ghost's lungs stopped a second seeing some of the new people. She got to see beforehand that the bearded man had shaved; up close he was almost naked without it. She found herself missing it. His eyes didn't hold the same distrustful animosity as it had several days ago, though they kept the intense skepticism.

"I don't think all of you were properly introduced before, were you? Ghost, this here is Rick Grimes, his son Carl, and baby girl Judith, and this here is our Ghost, you'll find she flitters about invisible and quiet as one as she wants to be."

She nodded to them, uncomfortable, clasping her arms, and beginning to look down when the baby squealed. She got to meet her and Carl before the same reaction ensuing, the baby holding her arms out to touch her. Ghost had seen plenty of babies, TV, and otherwise, but never up close. Her group home divided them into sections and babies were held in a different building, and as time went she never had to interact with one. But with this baby so up close, smiling and spittling at her, she couldn't help but grin. It was an innocent thing, holding no judgement or wondering about her and her background. Her instinct told her to take her, but she looked to Mr. Grimes now to see. His mask broke, a small smile playing on his lips as he nodded to her. She took the baby like she was a brittle leaf, not wanting to drop it but not wanting to break the fragileness. Once she situated Judith on her hip, a feeling like her body was made for this purpose; she bounced her making the girl call out in shrill delight again.

"Seems like you got another fan now. All the kids adore Ghost."

She flushed, that was an exaggeration. She didn't think either of the Anderson kids was particularly fond of her, mainly the eldest one. But sure, a handful of kids here, and she was their idol, why not? She cringed at the notion. She turned back to Mr. Grimes who had spotted her grimace, smiling at her in humor. Standing against the doorframe she put her weight on it while listening to Deanna gush about various recipients of the town. Her stance changed when Deanna made the motion to leave.

"I'm afraid I have more people to greet, so I'll leave you with Ghost. You may not believe it but she does make excellent company when she wants."

She scuffed her shoes on the floor hearing that. She knew Deanna was only amplifying everything to make Alexandria look like a utopia, but she never cared for people complimenting her, every bit of it seemed fake whether it was sincere or not. Rick gave a broad smile, flashing teeth, and Ghost couldn't help but catch the way his eyes crinkled…like him, yes, if he had some of his beard back and his hair wasn't so curly…She couldn't breathe, backing into the wall wanting to flee the room.

"I'm sure we'll get along fine, and if not, we know that Ghost can take us on."

Deanna chuckled in good nature. "Yes, she sure can, but let's hope that it won't come down to that."

Deanna patted her shoulder before walking away, telling her in that touch that she was a representative and that she needed to behave herself.

"Ghost, huh? Is that your real name?"

She shook her head at Carl.

"Who gave it to you then? Them?"

The boy gestured around the room, and she nodded. Pretty much, Aaron sort of came up with it first. He had followed her when she had went to the woods, easily able to pick up on him, she led him in a circle until he was lost, coming up behind him and scaring him. He told her she was too quiet, like a ninja but something more…

"Carl, why don't you find Ron and the others, I need to talk to Ghost about something."  
She was sure everyone could hear her swallow, the ocean having flood her mouth. Her hand was trembling but she went to her bag pulling out battered pages before handing them in Carl's direction.

"No way! Invincible – how'd you know I liked these?"

She was trying to calm her breathing, her senses climbing, but she was able to point to his shirt.

"Oh, yeah, thanks, it's awesome."

Carl grinned at her, not sure whether to shake her hand or not, but he opted by taking Judith from her to go find his new friends, leaving her with his dad. She couldn't raise her head to look at him, she knew his eyes weren't the same color, not that dark onyx she had gotten used to that looked at her with pride and tenderness…like a daughter. This wasn't him, and she wasn't there.

"Ghost? Please don't be afraid, you know none of us are going to hurt you, don't you?"

 

_You're right you're not my daughter, and I sure as hell ain't your dad._

No, he hadn't been, but he had been close, but this man wasn't him. Her face turned, his hand coming out to her as if comforting a cornered animal, seeing it she bit her cheek to hold in a sob. He had a watch too, only his wasn't broken. No, she didn't believe he would, and with that she knew she'd never be able to hurt him either. Keeping her face turned she nodded.

"Good. I was able to talk to Daryl today."

What? With the change in conversation where she had no idea who he was talking about she was able to ease up, her brain bypassing memories and trying to come up with how she should know the name Mr. Grimes gave. He caught her confusion and he an assuaging smile.

"He's the one with the crossbow – the one you took."

Oh, Crossbow, of course. He had been pretty much the only person from the group she had talked to, and perhaps it should have been apparent. But then again she had enough names to remember in her head, too many of the dead living inside her to remember every person that she came across. She bit her lip and nodded, letting her head dip to gesture to her bag, now hands free she was able to write on her board.

_"Do you think you'd be able to help? That you'd want them?"_

His stare stayed kind. "We're getting the lay of the land, getting our assignments –" She knew, and she also knew he was stuck being one of the security guards. "But I think we've started to feel at home here."

_"They're not bad people…just ignorant. Some people don't want them to know what's beyond the fences, what we're up against. But you do, your friends do. It's okay to live in the façade for a while, but we can't forever. But I don't everyone to die when it breaks."_

His voice lowered, almost sad. "You're so sure of that happening."

_"It always does."_

Mr. Grimes nodded, and Ghost could tell that he knew from experience just the same as her. She gestured to the bag again.

"Yeah, we can do that for you. We protect our own, and with us here you and your people are ours too."

She didn't quite agree with that, but she nodded in affirmation anyway. She pointed to the door, hoping he got that she'd rather hand over weapons where it was secluded and not surrounded by the neighborhood's eyes. She made her break for it, skirting past people.

"Oh, hey, it's good to see you. You look really good all dolled up."

It was the young woman that offered to help her with her wound. She offered a friendly smile, stiffening when the girl hugged her.

"It's been great here, and we have you to thank for that. I don't think you got to meet everyone yet, this is Glenn, my husband, and –"

"Maggie, you might want to hold off on that, you guys can talk later, Ghost and me were on our way out."

Her face must've still held that fearful sorrow because Maggie's green eyes turned concerned.

"Is everything all right?"

Mr. Grimes answered for her. "S'fine, just need some fresh air. We'll catch up in a bit."

The girl nodded, the people with her staring at them both as Ghost led them out. Outside she allowed him to lead, finding somewhere private for the exchange. They found their way to the house their group was given, and she went inside with him seeing all the folded blankets and pillows on the floor like there had been a makeshift slumber party. She laid the pistols she had found on the kitchen island, letting Mr. Grimes inspect them. He frowned when he went to touch her shoulder in appreciation only for her to flinch back.

"We do thank you for doing this, and I'm promising you, there is nothing for you to be scared of – not from us."  
She flashed a smile, knowing the shaking hadn't stopped yet.

"I mean it Ghost. I don't want it to offend you…but hearing Monroe say how all the kids look up to you. God, just…you can't be much older than Carl. I know you have to be smart and capable to make it out there, know I don't know anything of you or how you were able to last so long. But we'll help each other. I understand that you need to be on guard for a while, we're going to be too, but…we won't be the enemy, there's nothing for you to fear from us."

She shook her head, writing. "Not afraid, you remind me of someone."

Mr. Grimes' eyes widened, realizing something. "And he hurt you?"

Her own eyes enlarged. _"Jesus, no, he's the only one…"_ She erased it quick, she had cracked once, becoming vulnerable in front of him, and she wasn't about to let him further in. She was angry at herself, letting herself be careless, her guard was hindering and she was ready to be done with this. But he must've seen something that gave her away, the sadness, regret, the loss she held.

"I'm sorry."

She was too.

"There's nothing to be sorry for, Mr. Grimes."

"Call me, Rick, I'm old but not that old."

She smiled, nodding. She kind of hoped she'd be able to remember his name. He thanked her again, walking her out the door as he made his way back to the party. There was no way in hell she was going back, so shifting her close to empty bag on her shoulder she went back home. Inside, she tossed the shawl on the hall table, hearing laughter coming from the dining room.

" – I'm afraid that's what generally happens when you work for that kind of organization. But if it hadn't I wouldn't have joined OxFam."

She could hear Eric chiming. "It's how we met, the two of us were sent to Nigeria, and after a month things just…evolved."

She walked in, curious to whom they were talking to and she froze. She was about to back out of the room.

"Ghost, you're back, how was the party?"

She shook her head at Aaron wishing he hadn't directed attention to her. She felt Crossbow's – uh, Daryl's eyes on her, and with what she was wearing she felt attacked. She wanted to snarl at him, knowing he was judging her she went to stare him down seeing that his gaze had focused on her boots. She noticed that he didn't look as dirty as when they were done in the woods, trading out his ripped up shirt for a denim one.

"Come and sit down, I know you probably didn't eat anything over there."

No, she hadn't. She didn't need much food anymore, but she hadn't eaten since late last night and her stomach reacted to the mentions of being fed. She signed to them that she was going to change, not wanting to sit through her meal feeling degraded. She was much more comfortable in jeans or sweats anyways.

" – if you're out there in a store or something, I mean. Mrs. Neudermyer has been on Aaron forever about it, we have crates of pasta, but she wants to make her own. So when you're out there if you could…keep an eye…for one, what? Haven't you talked to them?"

To them? From what she heard she could figure out what Eric was hinting at. Neither of them ever wanted her out there, didn't think she could protect herself beyond the fences, and now that fucking Davy Crockett or whatever shows up it's out with her. How dare them to even think that…time and time again she proved herself. She did that long before crossing their paths. Not able to control her frustration she pounded her fist against the wall, grabbing her original bag off the table and heading out the door.

"Ghost, it's not what you think! Ghost! Ellie please."

That desperation made her balk, a part of her wanting to go back, and another angered further from the use of her name. She went to the gazebo; she wanted to cool off, not knowing how to fix this. She couldn't stay inside here, but she didn't want to leave here completely either. She found that a bit disheartening of itself, she had become attached again. She watched the little bit of water under the bridge, the light of the moon making it possible to see every ripple.

"Didn't run far, didja?"

Her shoulders stiffened, not answering.

"Aaron and Eric are worried bout ya. Out lookin' for ya, scared ya might've went outside the gates."

She closed her eyes. She'd have to find them before they went out and got hurt. But Daryl picked up on that.

"Told 'em I'd find ya for 'em."

"Hmmph."

His voice went gruff. "And what's that mean? Think I couldn't? Like I said ya didn't go far."

She turned to him, his eyes serious on her. "Sure it made great practice though, right? I'm going to tell you something you think you can just come in and take MY place then you're full of shit."

Her voice had lowered, trying to be menacing. But it got the opposite reaction. A hint of a smile coming on Daryl's face as he chuckled.

"That's what Aaron thought you believed. Hell, ain't here ta take your place, girl. Didn't think about it in the first place. Aaron thought it'd be good if I went with ya, not just recruitin' but when ya went out there. He knows he can't keep up with ya, but figures I can."

She pursed her lips. "I don't need a babysitter."

"Sure ya do, out here havin' a fit like a goddamn baby, ain't ya?"

"Hey, fuck you, man! I don't need shit from you. Don't even know me."

He nodded, picking up a piece of grass. "Yur right, I don't, but I know those two care about ya."

"I know they do, but having me tailed isn't going to keep me safe. Back-up doesn't do much of anything, just means you have someone else to look after besides yourself. Having you following me would get us both killed."

He didn't reply, but she saw his muscles tighten, like he wanted to lash at her, like he remembered something. They sat in silence for a while, something she didn't mind, when he had to speak again.

"So yur name ain't Ghost?"

She snorted. "Is it that obvious? You're the second one of your group to ask me that tonight."

He nodded. "Guess it is. Figured it was Riley though, not Ellie."

It was her turn to freeze then, her voice becoming distant. "And why would you think that?"

"That necklace ya got on. So who was she, a friend or sumthing?"

She grimaced. A friend? A fucking friend? No, she wasn't a friend, Riley had been her sanity.

She held onto the dog tag, something inside her snapping, too many people had been brought up tonight. "What about you? Who'd that necklace that's around your boot belong to? Or that knife? I can tell from the grip that it's made got a woman's hand, so who were they to you?"

She watched his eyes glaze over, body tense from anger.

"Yeah, it doesn't feel so good when somebody gets in your business, does it? How about you learn to keep stupid questions to yourself, asshole."

She didn't wait for him, wasn't going to for anybody else, she let herself rush back home. Ignoring Aaron and Eric when they asked her where she'd been, if she was okay, their apologies. She didn't need that, what she wanted – who she wanted would never be here.

_We can be all poetic and lose our minds together._

She had, multiple times. And now that she felt the tears falling she let herself pick up whatever was closest, flinging it against the wall. The smacking of the collision helped to ebb the hurt. Liking the feeling she became a blur, slinging everything she could, destroying anything she get grab. In the frenzy she didn't hear anyone come in, barely felt Aaron's arms wrap around to stop her, she fought, forgetting where she was. The two of them went to the floor, her outburst combined with the memories and sleep deprivation taking away her strength. He rocked her, saying something to Eric though she was too far away in her head to hear. Aaron began to stroke her hair, his gentle handling breaking her more, the creak of another sob ripping from her.

Her lips began moving, but no sound came out. It didn't need to, the words she was saying being repeated over and over on Aaron's arm.

_I'm sorry._

She was, oh, God, she was. She was sorry to all of them, to Aaron and Eric, everyone who ever cared about her knowing that in the end they'd all meet the same fate.


End file.
